I know this has been a definitely a long time since I've written. I have had several promptings to write in a journal but just have not. I don't even think I've written anything really on this blog but I do want to start fresh. Well not fresh, but start again for myself. I can't appreciate enough the love my friends and family have given me to help me through this accident. It has been almost 7 years since my accident and I have continually received love and support. My family especially has been the biggest support living with this accident. Things have been going well, I have graduated from college with a Bachelors in marketing. I have been using this to help my family businesses.
Sometimes I feel that this accident has really helped and benefited others. I have done several firesides and many speaking opportunities; hoping that my message will at least help a few others. Then sometimes I feel that when problems arise it is my fault. I know though that it isn't, it is just life. I do miss some of the opportunity that I missed out on being paralyzed. I know I'm just paralyzed and not contagious, but I still miss a lot of things the same. I know that with the Lord's help I can accomplish anything. I just need to accept my accident and do the best I can.
It's interesting that even though it will be seven years in May I still feel like it is a brand-new accident challenging me every day. Oh sure, it has gotten easier in some ways; understanding that I'm pretty much stuck in the chair and other things. But other days, it feels like I'm back in the hospital trying to convince myself that things will get better. I'm grateful they have, I'm grateful I am out of the hospital, I'm grateful that I don't have to be permanently in the hospital and I'm grateful for my family that have sacrificed so much to take care of me. I know it would have been a lot easier to put me in a nursing home or other facility and I'm just glad my parents and family have sacrificed for me so I could have a "normal" life. Normal as possible that is.
I'm also definitely grateful for the friends I have made and their influence and sacrifice for me as well. It is interesting though some of the friends that I have lost because either, they were or I was, too scared to do anything about it. What I mean is either they were too scared to accept me now for who I am or that I have not been as good as a friend as I should be.
It is one of my goals this year to keep up with this Journal so that I can look back and have something to see how far that I have progressed, spiritually, emotionally, and any other "lly." This is at least a start.
