De-Halo-ing Party

Our day started at 11:00 a.m. down in radiology; they forgot to let Ryan sleep until 1:00 p.m.!! Ryan had a second x-ray on his neck to make sure that the vertebrae remained in place after the “pot-hole” incident. We should find out the results tomorrow.

After we came up from the Swedish Hospital, we went for a “walk” down to the corner Ice-Cream/Sandwich Shop. Ryan went thru a door on his own, which was “very narrow”, and he caught his little finger on the door jam. His finger bent back, almost lying on the back of his hand. I really thought he had broken his finger, but luckily, he only scraped the skin near his fingernail. I “firmly” told him that he needed to be careful!! He thinks I am paranoid. I think this is his way of being in control of something, heaven only knows he doesn’t get to control much of anything.

We made it down to the sandwich shop and while sitting there, Mr. Don Digby, President of Navajo Transit Company, came in and spoke with Ryan. Mr. Digby noticed that Ryan had his Halo removed (from the wounds on his forehead) and told him that he was a graduate of Craig. He was in a motorcycle accident four years ago, which left him a quadriplegic. He said that he was walking miracle. Interestingly enough, he left the sandwich shop on a motorcycle!! After he graduated from Craig, he made a substantial contribution to the hospital, which resulted in the Craig Friendship Center. The Friendship Center is a large room big enough for a living area, dining area, and kitchen – with all of the amenities!! We expressed our sincere appreciation for the Friendship Center, as that is where we had Ryan’s de-Halo-ing party this afternoon!!

We enjoyed the party with lots of family and friends that we have met since we have been at Craig. One of the young girls that came spontaneously organized a game of “Fact or Crap.” I think that is the worst name for anything, but the game is similar to Trivial Pursuit and really makes you think and is a lot of fun! Ryan and Meredith were on a team and ended up winning, with minimal cheating!! We had about 40 kids who came and went – it was great!!

Ryan is getting ready for another big day tomorrow. We are going to go to church!! For the first time since May 4th, he will get to wear “real” clothes!! He is very excited to be able to attend Sacrament Meeting. His Bishop asked him to speak in Sacrament Meeting, but I think he will let him slide for a Sunday or two!!

We are so thankful for the last few days, Ryan has felt pretty well. We continue to see the blessings which we have received thru this ordeal and recognize the Lord’s hand in all things. We appreciate the love and support that we receive daily from each of you.

Love,
Dean, Terry and Ryan

Shave and a Haircut

Ryan looks like a new person!! A lot of the staff didn’t recognize him without the Halo! After his hair cut and now that he can wear his glasses, they’ll wonder who the new admit is??

Ryan went bowling today. Recreational Therapy has a mechanism that they clamp to the footrests of the wheelchair. It is a “ramp” that goes from his lap to the floor; it looks like a slide or an elephant trunk! Ryan would sit in his chair near the back of the ball retrieval rack with the ball sitting on a platform at his lap. Then, he would put his chair in gear and drive quickly to the top of the lane and quickly stop and the ball would “roll” or “slide” down the ramp and onto the lane and wah-lah, a strike (if he got lucky)!! He got the hang of it about the sixth frame. I don’t think we will go again, because he will whip us!! We had a nice “picnic” lunch that Craig provided and then came back to the hospital. We took some pictures, as soon as I get them developed, I will post them on the blog.

He was really tired after we got back. After the big day yesterday, the bowling wore him out! When we got back to the hospital, Occupational Therapy wanted to work on the headrest for his chair, since he did not have a Halo anymore! As we were getting ready to go into the Gym to meet Gail, the Occupational Therapist, he had a spasm and he cried out, “Hold my head!” I grabbed his neck (gently, but firmly) and held it back against the chair. A little scary for a moment or two!! It will be nice when he gets some muscles built back up in his neck so he can hold his “noodle” head, as Howard calls it. He got dizzy a couple of times, the first since Wednesday, Yeah!! He was so tired; Gail let him sleep thru most of the adjustments.

Dr. Hsu came in to the gym and said that the x-ray they took after the Halo removal looked really good. But, they wanted to take another x-ray after the “pot-hole” incident during our outing to the blue-grass concert. Ryan asked that they wait until about 1:00 p.m. so he could sleep in!! Dr. Hsu just laughed, but Howard came in and said that he honored his wish!! They are so accommodating!!

When we got back to the room, he got a haircut; the first since May 4th!! He was so tired, he wanted to wait until tomorrow, but we talked him into getting it cut. Howard came in right after the hair cut and took him for a shower. We have not heard how the shower felt; he has been sleeping since he got back to his room.

We had a nice surprise, Uncle Keith, Aunt Geralyn and Brett came to see Ryan. It will be fun to visit with them this weekend. We are going to have a “de-halo-ing” party tomorrow afternoon – actually, it gives us something to do over the weekend!! If you’re in town come join us!!

Thanks for the love and support. We love you all.
Dean, Terry and Ryan

The Big Day!

Ryan had a great day today; he "stood up" and --- was de-Halo-ed!! We never know what a day will bring!! The Neurosurgeon's nurse came in about 12:00 p.m. and said that Dr. Falci had looked at the C-Scan and said that the Halo could come off, but he would need to wear a "hard" collar for four weeks. She was very clear that the collar could not come off except for shaving, trach care and changing out the lining after showering. I think he was elated, although, he did not show it.

Before he could track down the Head Nurse to remove the Halo, he got to stand in the standing frame!! Interestingly enough, he did not get dizzy! The dizziness is perplexing, to say the least. The techs decided he liked the air "up there" rather than down at their level. He is 6’4" and when standing in the frame he gained another 2" or so and he towered over everyone. He said that it felt really good. We put a full-length mirror in front of him and he just kept smiling!!

07-28-05 Sitting in the "Standing Frame!" Audrey, a Physical Therapist, wants to make sure he is not going to pass out!

07-28-05 Here he is with his "angel", Meredith. We had never seen them "stand" together; it was awesome!
When the time came for the de-Halo-ing, he did let us take pictures and said that we could post them on the blog!! I believe he was excited, since he has not let us post anything until now!

This is a picture from Idaho Falls Regional Medical Center ICU about a week after the accident. He had really filled out from his roofing job with his Uncle Mike and he was so tan!

07-28-05 Just minutes before the de-Halo-ing! He was excited!! He wants a haircut in the worst way!! He has lost 30+ pounds.

07-28-05 The procedure underway. One tech, Nellie (right back), is holding the Halo, Trish the Head Nurse (right foreground), and Lori an LPN (left back), are unscrewing the Halo, and Darlene (left foreground), the Respiratory Therapist, is holding the trach so he can keep breathing! It took many hands to stabilize his head and remove all of the hardware, which he did not want to save!!

It was quiet a production. There was several staff members who came to see the Halo removed. Trish said that she had never taken off a Halo in front of so many people so "she had better not mess up!" Ryan has made many new friends who are very concerned about his progress since he has been here.

After he got the Halo off and had a 30-minute nap, we went to the Englewood Civic Center outdoor concert. I think I have mentioned that Englewood has a nice new Civic Center with an outdoor amphitheater. Every Thursday, they have a free concert; this week it was a blue-grass band. It was a beautiful night, no wind and about 70°. The Rec-Bus dropped the patients off about 5:30; we then went and got a bite to eat at a Japanese fast food restaurant and then went and sat in lawn chairs to enjoy the nice evening.

Ryan has made friends with Seth and Kierstie, Seth was hurt in an automobile accident in Spanish Fork Canyon. Both he and Meredith enjoy their company; they have a lot in common, just laughing, talking and comparing their feelings (or lack thereof), life in the "real world" and everyday life at Craig.

Seth compared going home from Craig like returning home after a mission. "You live in a fake world while serving a mission, so when you go home you are thrown back into the real world."

We left the concert about 8:45. Seth and Kierstie rode with us. Seth is a paraplegic and can get into a car – with his wheelchair in the back or trunk. Ryan and Meredith rode the Rec-Bus. There is quite a bit of road construction going on near the hospital and while riding home, the bus hit a pot-hole and Ryan’s head came off of the headrest and "flopped" around a couple of times. Meredith was having a hard time getting her seatbelt off to help hold Ryan’s head. Cindy, the nurse on the outing, managed to get a hold of his head and held it the remainder of the ride. Meredith was scared to death, she was pretty shook-up. As he was being transferred back to bed, he had a spasm and his head "flopped" around again. Meredith was not sure what to do, but Howard reassured her that he would be alright. Cindy then came in and told us that she had made the night nurses aware of what had happened and thought Dr. Balazy may want to do another x-ray in the morning to make sure that everything was still in place!! Ryan said that the "flopping" did not hurt, just scared him too. We pray all will be well.

We had some sad news today. Some of you that have been here have met Ryan’s friend Tom. He was the firefighter who rolled his truck while responding to a call. Tom went home a week ago Wednesday, he had been home four days when his nursing staff turned him and dislodged a blood clot that killed him. He had had problems with blood clots while at Craig – but it is still quite sad to hear of his passing.

With Tom’s passing, it is a reminder how fragile life can be. I just cannot figure out why the staff here at Craig wonders why I am scared to take Ryan anywhere!! As we look back at the busy day Ryan had today, we look forward to what tomorrow brings.

Thanks so much for your e-mails, phone calls, cards, prayers, etc. etc. We love you all.

Love,
Dean, Terry and Ryan

Delayed

Well, de-Halo-ing day came and went. We still have a Halo!! As of tonight, the Neurosurgeon hasn’t looked at the C-Scan, but Dr. Balazy seems to think that the Halo will need to stay on for a couple of more weeks. I saw the C-Scan results and not being medically competent(!), I could see that the “fusion” had not been completely achieved.

Last night Ryan was quite frustrated and discouraged; he told Meredith that he felt like he wasn’t progressing at all and that the Halo probably would not come off today. I don’t know if that was revelation, or total discouragement.

I often think of Abraham and Isaac. I can only imagine what Abraham was feeling during the days after he was asked to sacrifice his son. I can only imagine the feeling he had as he walked Isaac to the alter. I hope that we can be as faithful as Abraham during this trial; hopefully we will get to the alter with as much strength and faith as he.

We had a nice surprise today, our grandson showed up. Oh, his mom came too!! The staff is almost as excited as we are when he comes!! One of the Recreational Therapist took him and walked around the floor for 15 or 20 minutes!! He is such a cute kid (we are not at all prejudiced). He sure brightened Ryan’s day (and ours too!!).

We will know more tomorrow about the Halo. We know that it will be best for the Halo to remain in place if the vertebrae are not completely healed, although, it is tough! On the brighter side, he won’t get a cold shower from Howard!!

Last night Ryan had a nice visit from a couple of young men from his ward. It is fun when the “kids” come by. I call them kids because they are half our age!! We talk about real life problems – dating!! It makes us feel young – or old, depending on how you look at it! One of the young men left us with a “thought for the day!”

"Make something idiot proof, and they make another idiot!!!"

It is great to laugh. Tomorrow will be a better day!

Love, Dean, Terry and Ryan

God is Good

Ryan had the C-Scan today to determine if the Halo will come off tomorrow, but we have not heard yet what the results were. Oh, the waiting!! If nothing else, I have a greater understanding and appreciation for Job!

Ryan has had three “rotten” days! He has complained of his cheekbones and jawbones hurting. We rub and rub and rub them, which helps him to feel better for a short period of time, and then the rubbing starts again. The doctor had a puzzled look on his face and said, “That’s not neuro!!” Maybe the Halo is screwed in too tight!! We hope that this will pass and he can take a few steps forward again. He has slept most of the last three days!! Dean and I wish we could sleep half the time he does, but we just worry, worry, worry!!

We have talked with several within the medical community in Farmington the last couple of days trying to figure out how the best possible way to care for Ryan when we get him home. We are finding that Farmington is known for many things, but it is lacking in respiratory resources. I spoke with a woman today who manages respiratory equipment (ventilators, tubing, etc.), she was going to fax me their company’s’ “check list” of things that we will have to have in our home (proper electrical outlets, backup generator, larger doorways and hallways for EMTs, etc.) in order to accommodate Ryan and the ventilator. She called back and said that she had spoken with some of her supervisors and they wanted to caution us before we read the fax that it would “scare us to death!” She wondered if we were going to be able to handle it!! I thought, “Better to be scared to death in the hospital than to get home and be scared to death!!”

We have had a good laugh with the techs, nurses, and doctors the last couple of days. Last Thursday, when Howard (Ryan’s favorite tech) was getting Ryan up to go to the Country Concert, he passed out! Howard has been at Craig for 24 years and has never seen anyone pass out. It really rattled him!! Ryan, being the kind, thoughtful, and considerate individual that he is has given him such a hard time and has told everyone he comes in contact with, even Dr. Balazy, about the incident. The past few days when Ryan is seen in the same vicinity as Howard, the other staff give Howard such a hard time. Ryan is going to have his first shower (hopefully) on Thursday and Howard keeps telling him that he will have the coldest shower ever!! It has been pretty funny and has livened up our spirits!

The staff, here at Craig, continues to reinforce the fact that “this too shall pass” and Ryan will improve. We have to remember, this is such a devastating injury and it has only been about 84 days (but who’s counting!). He has done quite well considering everything he has been thru. Although, the other day he said that he felt it would have been easier if he had died. Through tears, I told him, “Yes, it would have been easier, but the Lord saved you for a purpose.” We continue to believe that the Lord’s hand is directing our lives and we will try to remain strong and overcome our shortcomings and weaknesses. As we work thru some of these challenges, we see so many of the blessings that He has given us and we are thankful.

When we have had a particularly difficult day, someone always comes by and shares a kind word, a smile, or a thought that has made their day brighter – which makes us smile. In fact, when Ryan was waiting in the hallway down at the Swedish Hospital for the C-Scan today, a young woman (I did not even get her name) asked if she could be so bold as to ask what had happened to Ryan. I told her “yes,” and then shared with her the story of his accident and how he is doing. After we finished talking, she said, “I am so sorry, I will pray for him.” God is good and He is everywhere.

We love and appreciate each of you for sharing your faith, prayers, and love.

Dean, Terry and Ryan

Getting Close

The big – de-Halo-ing – week is here!! I came into Ryan’s room this morning and they had taken the “extension” off of his bed (they do that so they can get in the elevator to take him to Swedish) so that he could have a C-Scan to confirm that the C-1 and C-2 vertebrae’s have fused properly. The Transport Tech’s took him thru the tunnel to the Swedish Hospital for the scan and found that they didn’t have an “order” for the scan to be completed. We spoke with Dr. Balazy this afternoon and he said that he had placed the ordered for the scan twelve weeks ago; they must have lost it or missed placed it he said. So, Ryan gets to go for the “joy” ride again in the morning, or sometime tomorrow!! We are hoping that the Halo has done its job and that it can come off. If the vertebrae have not fused properly, they will leave the Halo on for a period of time or, take it off and do surgery. So, we are in “wait and see” mode. I hope it comes off for Ryan’s sake; he wants a shower and a hair cut in the worst way!!

Ryan can’t seem to get past the dizziness; he had it while in bed today!! The doctor said that his body is not accepting the “drugs” as they normally prescribe them for other patients. He changed the Neurontin dosage again today to see if that will help.

Ryan went down to the second floor where the brain injury patients are and met a young man named Jessie. Jessie was in a motorcycle accident; he was going 70 mph and hit a car head on. He had been in a coma for two weeks and was paralyzed on one side. Jessie is doing really well; since he has been here, he has regained his memory and some movement on the one side. The docs think that Jessie will make a full recovery. It was interesting to hear his story and see that miracles do occur each and every day.

Occupational Therapy is working on several devices to aid in Ryan’s rehab. They want us to look at a “lap board” which will fit over the arms of Ryan’s wheelchair so that he can use a laptop, read a book, eat, etc. We will also look at some different types of technology to assist Ryan when at home in turning on lamps, calling for help, changing channels on the television, stereo functions, etc. etc. I continue to be amazed at the ingenuity of the therapists here at Craig. Some of them are in wheelchairs so they understand what it takes to just get thru a day!!

We are going to try to get Ryan to Sacrament Meeting on Sunday. We are all “certified” to take him off campus. The Bishop came by last night and asked if he and Meredith would speak one of these Sundays!! Meredith plugged her ears and told the Bishop that she couldn’t hear him!! It will be nice to get out “on our own” in small doses; this will help us get ready for the real world.

Our love to all.

Love,
Dean, Terry and Ryan

Life Experience

Ryan has had a rough weekend; I guess Uncle Keith’s and Aunt Geralyn’s visit was way to much for him!! He got up yesterday and wanted to “do something” but couldn’t get his head off of the headrest on his chair. He was dizzy most of the time!

We did have a nice visit from Ted Leslie. His son was in a devastating accident 380 days ago (Meredith asked, who’s counting!!). Dan, Ted’s son, dove into the shallow end of a swimming pool and fractured his C-3 vertebrae. He is a quadriplegic; he has feeling in his neck and shoulders, but cannot move his arms or hands. He was on a ventilator during his stay at Craig, but was able to be weaned off before he left the hospital. This summer, he went back to school at BYU; he enrolled in one class to see how things would work out. It was great to hear their story and hear some of the things that we won’t get from the hospital – life experience.

Brother Leslie said he feels his brain is split; he feels schizophrenic!! He said that one side of his brain tells him to have faith that Dan will have a full recovery and the other side tells him to prepare for the worst. Boy, do we know that feeling!! It was good for Ryan to hear Dan’s story, but also somewhat discouraging; as this may be the way it is for a very long while. Dan will be home from BYU in about three weeks and Brother Leslie has invited us to his home to meet Dan and see what they have done with remodeling to meet Dan’s needs.

We had plans to go and meet a couple of new patients on the floor, but Ryan couldn’t get over the dizziness so he went back to bed.

Today hasn’t been any better. He has had a headache all day and he feels like he is not getting enough air. Tonight they came in, took some lab samples, then gave him a “heavy duty” lung treatment to see if that would loosen up any of the mucus in his lungs to help him breath a little better. Hopefully!

We continue to pray that Ryan will be able to get off the ventilator. Today, being July 24th, we were reminded in Sacrament Meeting of the pioneers and some of their struggles and hardships. We are grateful for our heritage and for our ancestors who came before us. As we read and hear of their stories, it gives us courage to keep going and endure this trial as they endure their trials. Our doctor in Farmington told us that we may be the “pioneers” for the home ventilator in Farmington! That scares me to death, but if that is our trial, we are up to the challenge (maybe thru many a tear!). We continue to see the Lord’s Hand in all things and have “faith in every footstep.”

Love to all, thanks again and again for all the support, prayers, e-mails, letters, etc.
Dean, Terry and Ryan

Back in Denver

Well, it is good to be back in Denver, I think?? It was so nice to see all of our dear friends and family while we were home.

After being in Farmington and visiting with Medicaid, our family Doctor, and Contractors/Realtors, we have decided that the soup line at the Salvation Army is not lookin’ to bad!! Ryan is now signed up for Medicaid and will qualify for Food Stamps!! I never dreamed that we would qualify for Food Stamps! It was so hard to go into the Social Security office! We are trying to set up medical services when we return to Farmington, but are not sure if the resources Ryan needs are going to be there! The medical community is working on some answers for us; so we will see what they can come up with.

We got back last night just in time to go with Ryan to a Country Concert at the Englewood Civic Center outdoor amphitheater. The night was so calm and beautiful; it had rained for about 15 minutes and cooled things off. We didn’t get to stay very long, one of the drivers for the recreational van didn’t like country music so we had to come home!! It will be nice not to have to be dependent on others to make out our schedule. (Geralyn tells me that I need to learn to be more dependent on others!! ) We ate at a little Mexican Restaurant before the concert. While going into the restaurant, Meredith was trying to open the door for Ryan, Ryan turned the corner too fast and he ran into her ankles. Ouch!! Meredith was a great sport and didn’t want to make a big deal out of it; but, you should see her ankle tonight!! After Ryan found out what had actually happened, he felt really bad!

Ryan had a good day today; the dizziness was not as bad as it had been earlier in the week. The Occupational Therapist changed out the leg rests on his chair so that he can bring his feet up without having to recline all the time. I told Ryan that Grandpa would love his chair now! They are hoping that this will help with the blood pressure and dizziness.

Ryan was feeling up to going down to the “corner” deli and ice cream shop. As we were going down the sidewalk and neared the gateway, Ryan needed to “recline” for a moment. As he was reclining, he was scheming and concocting a plan to scare all of us!! He sat up, “drove” slowly thru the gateway, and then took a direct right and “sped” down the grassy embankment to the sidewalk leading to the deli. We all thought that he had had a spasm so we went darting after him. He had the biggest grin on his face, and then laughed at all of us!! Geralyn was ready to smack him earlier in the week; I am going to smack him now!!! It is so good to see a smile on his face, but we did have to have a talk!! After our hearts stop racing, we had a nice stroll to the deli and a nice sandwich!

Again, it was a very nice evening tonight. After we ate dinner, we went and sat by the fish pond and then Meredith and Ryan wanted to go for a walk!! The rest of us came up to Ryan’s’ room and had birthday cake for Uncle Keith – he was hoping we would forget!

In the next week or so, we are going to have to make some hard decisions. We tried to talk to Ryan today about a few of the many challenges that are ahead of us, but he was not ready for it! He feels that he has “caused” this trial and he is so sad about it. We hope that we can help him thru this process without it being detrimental to his sweet disposition and pleasant personality.

We do feel that our Heavenly Father is right by our side through all of these challenges; we continue to have faith that “all will be well”.

Love,
Dean, Terry and Ryan

Attitude

We have come to appreciate the writings of Dickens…. “it is the best of times, it is the worst of times.” Though it is very hot in Denver, Ryan still struggles with periods of being very cold. After being chilled, his body will become very hot to the touch. . . it is quite a puzzle. He also “blacked out” a couple of times yesterday and once today. The dizziness is still a big problem. Yesterday he was unable to maintain an upright sitting position because it was so bad. We had planned to take a short walk to a sandwich/ice cream shop just across the street, but were unable to go. Seth and Kirstie, (he’s a paraplegic. . . car accident….from Utah) were coming with us for dinner. Ryan was really looking forward to going and did his best to work through the dizzy feeling, but just couldn’t. The dizziness goes away completely when he is lying in bed, so he is able to have a reprieve. The goal is to sit up for several hours every day, as well as attending his classes. We continue to question the doctor, he continues to say it is just the injury and they are “watching” it. We hope he is right!!

This afternoon there was a little “going away” gathering for Tom. He was quoted earlier on the website with the infamous “a rock with lips” phrase. (Tom is about 50 years old, on a ventilator, paralyzed from the neck down and fed through a tube.) Tom has been here for the past seven months, and he and Ryan have become friends. Despite the frustratingly dizzy day Ryan had, he very much wanted to go and say good-bye to Tom. They shared kind words with each other, thanked each other and Tom told Ryan to “be strong and keep up the fight”. He reminded Ryan that he “was young and could do it”. It was very touching watching them communicate their love and hope for each other. Ryan told Tom that he was glad he had grown to know Tom as a friend. For Keith and I it was one of those quiet moments in life, though fleeting, when one knows they will be forever changed by it. A very tender moment!

Tonight a couple of young men came by to visit. One of them told Ryan that the Bishop speaks of him often on Sunday. Bishop Hatch had commented on how one comes to visit Ryan to “cheer him up” and leaves feeling more cheered himself. One of the young men read a quote by Victor Frankl, who had survived WWII in a concentration camp. There he learned that when everything else is taken away, no one can take away the attitude a person chooses to have. Dr. Frankl speaks of choosing, despite some of life’s worst conditions, to be hopeful. (From the book, Man’s Search for Meaning by Victor Frankl) It was a great quote, one that Ryan personifies, and the young man pointed that out and thanked Ryan for being such a good influence. Despite the struggles, he’d had most of the day, Ryan was kind, smiled and visited with the boys. I simply don’t know what to say except that I am continually amazed at his strength. We do have to add that his smiles and “will” seem even stronger when Meredith returns from work!

We were concerned all day about the blackouts, the dizziness, the chills, the heat, the not eating enough, drinking enough etc. etc. But I must say, at the end of the day, what stands out above all, is the fact that Dean and Terry have raised a wonderful young man. He is kind, thoughtful, unselfish and very strong. He is grateful and expresses appreciation for the assistance and kindness of all he meets. We are soooooooo proud to know him and feel we are better people for our association with him.

Thanks so much for your love and support. Ryan appreciates every word, prayer and thought.

Love, Keith and Geralyn

Hot One at the Zoo

Saturday was very hot! Keith and I met Dean, Terry, Ryan and Meredith at the Denver Zoo. By the time we arrived, they were ready for lunch in a cool place, thankfully! One of those in the group said his car thermometer registered a 106 outside temp, don’t know if he was right or not, but it was very, very warm. The group was in high spirits and after not seeing Ryan for a couple of weeks; we agreed that he looked better than when we were here earlier this month. The antibiotics have obviously helped him feel better, he looks good, has put on a couple of pounds.

Three of the four patients attending the outing were on ventilators. Everyone seemed to be having a good time despite the heat, though one wheelchair had stopped working and had to be pushed. Much extra work as these are not small chairs. Meredith was in charge of the spray bottle and that helped keep Ryan cool. Many of the exhibits were inside and air conditioned which was wonderful. It also helped to have an umbrella and Meredith teased Dean that he would get distracted while looking at the animals and cover himself instead of Ryan. A good laugh for everyone.

Dean and Terry left to go home after Ryan was on the bus and headed back to Craig. We followed the bus back to the hospital and all the while we were getting Ryan settled he talked about what a great time he had on the outing. It was wonderful to see him enjoy everything about the day, despite the heat. After the tech got him back into bed, the RT came in and was working on his ventilator. Keith and Meredith had both left the room. Suddenly the vent stopped and Ryan was not getting any air. I was BEYOND THANKFUL THAT THE RT WAS IN THE ROOM. Because it was the weekend, the staff changes and sometimes those working are only here for a shift now and then. The RT looked at me and asked if I knew where the ambu bag was. I wanted to yell, "Lady, you work here, not me! I just got back into town!" Luckily, I did know where it was and told her. It is always right by the ventilator. I pumped the bag while she tried to figure out why things were not working properly. I kept thinking to myself that things were under control as she would call for help if she could not fix the problem. The scary part is that she never really figured out what had gone wrong. I kept saying to Ryan, "Are you okay? Are you okay?" He was very calm and kept mouthing that he was getting air. The ventilator finally started working and Ryan, WHAT A KID, starts LAUGHING, is finally able to speak with his voice again and says, "Welcome back Aunt Geralyn!!" I wanted to cry from relief, laugh, smack him and kiss him all at the same time. We are continually amazed at his willingness and decision to be happy, despite his situation.

Today has been a quiet Sunday. Ryan says he enjoys a day now and then when he doesn’t have to go through all the “drill” of getting up in the chair, etc. etc. etc. He had several visitors from the Singles Ward. It renews your faith in everything good to see so many kind and caring young people. They have a wonderful energy and positive outlook on life that is contagious. It is a real uplift to Ryan when they visit and makes the rest of us also feel hope for all good things.

On behalf of Dean, Terry and Ryan, we express our love and thanks to everyone for their special prayers. Your love and support is such a strength to the entire family. We know we are loved and led by an all knowing Heavenly Father. We thought today of the primary song; (words from memory so they may not be exactly right.)

Faith is knowing the sun will rise
Lighting each new day.
Faith is knowing the Lord will hear
My prayers each time I pray.
Faith is like a little seed
When planted it will grow
Faith is knowing within my heart
When I do right, I know.

As this journey continues, we learn more and more each day that it is our dependence and faith in Him that will get us through.

Our love to you all, Ryan, Keith and Geralyn

Poppin' Wheelies

Ryan was exhausted after going fishing!! He could hardly open his eyes and hold his head up (I guess he doesn’t have much choice in holding his head up with the halo)! But, he was worn out, he slept most of the day yesterday; although, he felt pretty good. Dr. Balazy came in to check on Ryan and asked how the TED Sock (or tubes) were doing. Ryan seems to think that they have helped; although, when we were fishing his blood pressure began to rise and so he asked us to take off one layer of “tubes.” That helped. He his learning to “listen” to what his body is telling him.

Today when he got up, the dizziness was back!! He reclined for most of his Physical Therapy class. Wouldn’t it be great to go to a class in a recliner? However, he passed out again!! I asked the nurse if it could be an inner ear problem? I don’t know what to think, except I will never get used to “that” look.

Ryan has had some trouble with the “gear shifts” on his chair so he has been using the “granny gear” until Todd, from Maintenance, came and fixed the gears. Todd came in to the gym while Ryan was “reclining” during physical therapy and fixed his chair!! I am still amazed that the staff will go wherever the patient is and take care of what ever it is that needs to be addressed. Sometimes we will see two or three different staff members around Ryan’s or someone else’s chair taking care of things.

After Physical Therapy, we went down to the basement cafeteria to eat some lunch and Ryan found second gear!! There is a long “quiet” hallway to the cafeteria and Ryan tried out second gear; it worked great. Dean and I were chasing him down the hall!! He had a big grin on his face and said, “I like that much better!!” After lunch we came back to the elevators, he stopped to get on and then did a couple of donuts! After a couple of spins he said, “Oh, I can’t do that, that makes me dizzy!!” I am glad the power chair can’t “pop wheelies!” --My heart can’t take it!! We came back up stairs and he “zoomed” across the bridge!! Ok, so now I have to get on the treadmill to keep up with him!! Hey, it put a smile on his face – what else matters???!!

Tomorrow, Ryan gets to go to the Denver Zoo. He is looking forward to another day outside the hospital. We hope that it won’t be to hot… but the weather report says it is going to be a “scorching” day. We sure hope it is not too much for Ryan.

Dean and I attended the Denver Temple this morning (it is nice to be an area where there is a Temple fifteen minutes away). After the session we spoke with the Temple Presidency about Ryan being able to attend. President Brown assured us that they “would love to have Ryan come” and “we will accommodate him any way we can.” As you can imagine, we are very concerned and apprehensive about “re-entering” the real world; it is so nice to know and hear, “we will accommodate him any way we can.”

Dean and I are going home to Farmington tomorrow to try to start the process of getting Ryan home! Geralyn and Keith are going to come and chaperon Ryan and Meredith!!! We are so grateful for the love and support that our wonderful family and awesome friends give us.

We continue to pray that we will not have to take Ryan home on a ventilator. Dean read a “Message of Inspiration” to Ryan from the Church News, which President Hinckley gave in a regional conference in Salt Lake City. He said:

"To think that the great God of all is interested in me and you and is concerned with our welfare and our well-being and bringing to pass His eternal purposes in our behalf. What a marvelous and wonderful thing it is that we can approach Him in prayer, that you and I are his sons and daughters in whom He has a unique and marvelous interest, and that somehow, which I can’t understand or fully appreciate, he will listen and hear and answer our prayers…. Be not faithless, but believing in the availability of your Father in Heaven to listen to your prayers and answer them and guide you, and direct and bless and help you."

Love,
Dean, Terry and Ryan

Fishin'!

Well, Ryan is on calorie count again!! Just when we think we have “something” under control, we get to start over. He is down to 154 pounds, from the 182 he weighed before this all started!! His appetite has increased quite a bit, but not enough to put on any weight!! He gets to be weighed tomorrow, so we are trying to get him to eat lots tonight!!! I hope that he will have maintained the 154 pounds, rather than having lost any more weight.

Speaking of pounds, we went fishing today and Bob, one of the patients, caught a 7lb 14oz channel cat fish (they brought in the scale!!). It was huge!! He was so excited!! He had to work really hard to get the fish in, not only the weight and the obstinacy of the fish, but being a paraplegic, he had only upper body mobility and advantage. We went to the Denver Rocky Mountain Arsenal and the staff there said that it might be the biggest catfish that has come out of the lake; they needed to check their records however.

Ryan had a great time. Peter, an avid angler and a volunteer, set him up with a “sip and puff” fishing pole. Note in the picture, the ¼” plastic tubing at the forefront of the battery pack; there was an actual plastic “flexible straw” which fit in the end of tubing for Ryan to “sipped and puffed” from. As we asked Peter about the set up, he mentioned that he had built seven of these poles so far and was working on a new and improved model! He was not trying to sell anything, just a genuine concern to try to help a fellow angler. When Ryan would “sip” on the straw, it would activate a speed reel to reel in the pole. Then he would “puff” to start another motor to lift the pole back, at the same time stretching a steel spring to cock the release mechanism. After coming back to the right spot, Ryan would let the pressure off the straw, a clutch would release, and the steel spring would pull the pole forward and cast the line. As with many things, Ryan got the hang of it right away and was able to cast his pole very effectively. Peter told us that the parts alone were around $1,000.00, what a generous and bighearted contribution to those in Ryan’s place!! After we finished fishing, another volunteer showed us the back of Peter’s van and it looked like a warehouse for the serious angler. It appears that Peter truly loves what he is doing.

About five other volunteers were there to help the three patients bait their poles and cast them into the water, if they needed help. Bob, who we talked about previously, is a paraplegic and did not need help, Cory was in a motocross accident and sustained a brain injury and did require help. After Ryan’s pole was baited, he was able to cast and retrieve it himself. After the volunteers got all the poles baited and cast into the water, it got pretty quiet as we were waiting for the fish to “bite” (can fish hear our conversations??), Ryan’s pole started jumping and everyone got so excited that he had a “hit!” Ryan just started laughing; he had “sipped” a couple of times on the pole to make it appear that there was a fish on the other end!! That “broke the ice” and everyone started laughing and gabbing.

Meredith actually caught the first fish. It was her first ever!! She got so excited and was not sure what to do with the pole; a volunteer came over, helped her reel it in, and then “net” it. It was a good-sized large mouth bass. The Arsenal has a “catch and release” policy, with all the radiation in the water you wouldn’t want to keep them anyway!!!

Dean got a pole, started fishing, and eventually caught a “very small” bass. Ryan and Meredith just laughed. As Ryan was observing the catch, he said, “Dad, it’s so cute!” Dean’s catch was not even close in size to Meredith’s’, although, he kept at it and ultimately ended up catching the most bass. Each time he brought one out of the water, it got a little bigger – but never did match Meredith’s catch!!! Unfortunately, Ryan was the only one with a pole that did not catch anything; he had a great time however.

One of the volunteers, Joe, was so cute – he was probably in his 80’s. He said that he loves to fish and just enjoys helping others like Ryan learn how to fish again. As he teared up, he told me that his wife of 62 years had passed away two years ago; he said he missed her so much, I can only imagine after all those years. What a remarkable feat, to be married 62 years! Joe bated Meredith’s pole for her “big catch!”

We got back to the hospital and Ryan was “beat!” Hopefully, he will sleep well. We continue to be amazed at the number of people who are so willing to help us thru this process by sharing of themselves and their time. We pray that the Lord will bless each of you for sharing with us and helping Ryan to “re-enter” society as independently as possible.

Love, Dean, Terry and Ryan and Meredith!

Cars and Fishing, What More Could You Want??

After an emotional late night discussion, we had a hard time getting started this morning!! We then learned that Ryan had to be “bagged” about 4:30 a.m., so he was really tired!! He has a humidifier on his ventilator to help with the “western” dryness. With the humidifier, water can accumulate in the tubing. The night Respiratory Therapist was trying to empty out the water in the tube and some of the water flowed back into the trach, which caused the air to stop flowing!! Therefore, the “bagging” with the Ambu Bag, until they could get the trach free of water. Never a dull moment!!

Ryan is trying out a software program called Dragon NaturallySpeaking. It is a program, which learns your voice fluctuation and your pronunciation of words. He “trained” Dragon to recognize his voice by reading text that utilizes a wide range of words and then the program will (try to) adapt to his voice. In order for the program to work optimally, you need to be in a very quiet sitting, without background noise. His ventilator noise does not sound too bad in a room full of people and other equipment with all of their beeps and sounds, but when he is in a very quiet room, the vent is VERY loud!! As he was trying to write an e-mail, for practice, he got frustrated because the computer kept writing “garbleddy goop!” We could not figure out what language it was using!! He was working on a computer in the Craig Lab; I think that if we get a good headset microphone that sits close to his mouth, maybe we won’t have as much of a problem with the background noises! It will be really nice if we can get the software to work so that he can be a little more independent. It will also help if we can get it to work before he gets too frustrated with it all!! Believe me, after we sat there for about an hour, we were all frustrated. Just one more reason to get rid of the ventilator!!

Today, Physical Therapy told Ryan that they want him to get in the “standing” equipment next week. We watched a young man “stand” today. The equipment has pads at the knees and a pad at chest height. The patient sits on a seat (it looks similar to one of grandpa’s tractor seats) which is connected to a back support and headrest. The patient is then raised with a lever a few inches at a time (his knees push against the pads as he is being raised) until he/she reaches a standing position and then his chest rests against the chest pad. There is a platform just above the chest pad so that the patients’ arms can lean or rest when he reaches a full stance. The young man, who used the equipment today, was a paraplegic, which allows him more upper body strength; I am having a hard time picturing Ryan “standing” when his body is a wet noodle!! They tell us that it will be good to get him “stretched” out in a standing position so that all of his organs can “breath” for a little bit!!

Tomorrow they are having the 17th annual Motorsports Car. It appears that it is a HUGE showing of different types of sports cars. Clarkson Street along the front of the hospital and the parking area behind the hospital has all been cleared for the event. They have posted signs up and down the street directing traffic, food lines, and wheelchairs!!! They will also be cooking and serving lunch outside for all the patients. When they have an “outdoor” meal, only one of the kitchens in the hospital is open to serve “bed-rest” patients; everyone else is asked to eat outside at the BBQ!! Craig does a great job of trying to cover all areas of interest for their patients.

Ryan will also be going fishin’ at about 3:00 p.m. tomorrow. One of the Recreational Therapists came in today and told Ryan that we will leave for the “outing” about 3:00 p.m. and return around 9:00 p.m. The lake is about an hour drive away and we will stop for fast food along the way. I am a little concerned that he will be in a vehicle “bouncing” around for two hours – he thinks that he will be OK. We will also be concerned with not letting him get to hot or be in the sun to long, hopefully there will be some shade trees to cover his sensitive skin. I hope that he can get a good nights rest tonight so that he will be “up” for the big day tomorrow.

Speaking of a good nights rest, after our emotional discussion last night, we are realizing that we need to communicate better and be more open about our feelings during this time of trial. It seems that we let the “stress” of all of this build up until it becomes rather unmanageable!! I think that we all have “accepted” (in our own ways) the major changes that Ryan’s injury has made in each of our lives, but some days it is difficult to absorb all the necessary adjustments (i.e., 24/7 care, further education, insurance, Medicaid, home remodeling, etc. etc.). We recognize and are grateful for the miracles that we have received. We continue to pray of “a miracle of breath” for Ryan. We now understand what Dr. Moreno meant when he said that taking a breath was a “quantum leap;” it is HUGE!

Lisa is up and BYU-I and is playing in the BYU-I Basketball League. She had a game on Saturday and sent us an e-mail today, she made the Sports Page!!! I showed it to Ryan and he said, “I had to break my neck to get in that paper!!” All is well!

We love and appreciate all of you. Dean, Terry and Ryan

Computers and Velcro

Today has been a good day for Ryan. His first class was not until 1:00 p.m. so he had a casual morning, almost too casual. They were admitting another patient today about the same time that Ryan was getting up for the day. We have learned the transfer procedure so we are able to use the hoist and get him out of his bed and into his chair. What we haven't been taught is how to switch him from the ventilator in his room to the portable ventilator on his chair. So we waited, and waited, and waited, over an hour. It can certainly try a person’s patience.

During his PT class today, they used a computer-imaging program to map the pressure points while he is sitting in his chair. As we have discussed previously, skin care is a major concern with SCI patients. Because they have no feeling and cannot adjust themselves, or shift positions to relieve an uncomfortable position, they must be moved every two hours while they are in bed and every 15 - 20 minutes when they are in their chair. This mapping program showed where his weight was hitting the cushion and was putting undue pressure on his skin. The cushion that he has in his chair has a gel pad to help shift the pressure. We again used the hoist to lift him up, out of his chair, while Audrey (PT) put the computer sensor pad on top of the seat. We then lowered Ryan back down on the seat. On the computer screen, we could see, in blue, where his pressure points were. Overall, it looked good. After trying a different seat and re-imaging, Audrey lowered his footrests to spread the pressure to his thighs. It is amazing the fine points of the care required for a spinal cord injury patient.

In his OT class today they spent most of the time modifying his headrest trying to give him support for his head and neck when he is in the recline position (weight shift). The headrest had been changed to give him some support on his lower neck, but it was painful. The one that was put on today is large enough to give him support, but it also covers the sore on the back of his head. So we used Velcro to attach some padding to the edges of the rest to give his head some support but allowing a space between the pads so it would not touch the sore. And I used to think that duct tape could fix anything. I have learned that Velcro is a quadriplegic's best friend. During this class, his ventilator began chirping indicating a low battery. Again, we waited and waited for respiratory to come and fix the problem. Sometimes it is tempting to call a "stat" to speed them up. I do remember a story about a boy that cried wolf, so I guess we had better behave.

On a separate note, we would like to thank those of you who made phone calls and contacts on Meredith's behalf. She has a job. She began working for a dentist in the Aurora area last Friday. She will be able to get 40 hours per week, which will help with her school next fall. I keep trying to get her to write one of these blog updates, but so far we haven’t been successful. She is a great person and is such a delight to have around. We really think a lot of her.

Yesterday, Ryan received an e-mail from Brian who attends the singles ward here in Denver. He is in the Philippines completing an internship for a law firm this summer. He and Ryan served in the same mission in the Philippines, however not at the same time. It was fun for Ryan to reminisce before he left and we are looking forward to his return to update Ryan on what is happening there. Ryan also has a cousin currently serving her mission in the Philippines (Ashley, don't get too trunky).

We have received e-mails from other missionaries who have expressed an interest in coming to see Ryan. He LOVES visitors. Please feel free to come, when it fits your schedule.

It truly has been a blessing to have so many people from many different parts of the world share their experiences with us as we go down this journey. We are so grateful for all of the love and support that we have received.

Dean, Terry, and Ryan

Chicken and Dumplings

My apologies!!! When I go back and read the updates, I am “quite” amazed at all of the spelling and grammar errors; I will try to “quit” doing that!! I will have to let Bill Gates know that his Spell-Checker doesn’t work very well!! Or, could it be way too late and “quiet” when we write the updates – hopefully, you can “read between the lines.”

Any ideas for controlling dizziness and black outs??? Ryan continues to scare us! It is becoming a daily thing for him to go white in the face, then his eyes roll back into his head, and then he blacks out. I don’t think we will ever get used to that look!! Jackie his daytime tech said, “He should be past this by now.” He continues to get dizzy when he is up in his chair as well. His chair reclines so he sits, reclines, sits, reclines, sits and reclines, never getting comfortable. He will hardly drive his chair with the “sip and puff”, I think because he is somewhat fearful. I cannot blame him!!

Every second Friday they have what they call TGIF for Ryan’s group. They try to do something a little bit different from the usual therapy classes. As we went into the gym, we saw one of his group members, Scott. I asked Scott if he knew what they had planned and he said, “I think some kind of game or “wheelchair follow the leader!” There were only three of their group that were able to attend; Carolyn could not “drive” her chair so they decided to play a game. We played SORRY!! Scott, who is 50, was a little putout by the “game” idea. However, as they got into it, he and Ryan started bantering with each other and it turned out to be quite fun!! I think, like the fishing, they try to get the patients to interact and use their wit and wisdom, while strategizing and trying to “open new doors” and expand their minds; as that is all they have right now.

Ryan has had a sore on the back of his head, which in size is a little larger than a silver dollar. They think the sore began when his body would spasm and he would hit his head against the headrest on his chair. Grace, the Head of Nursing came in and completed a debridement of the hair and outer skin, which means she scraped off the dead skin and exposed the infected area. She said that it actually looked much better than she thought it would. After the procedure, they want the area to remain open to the air so that it can heal. Because the sore is right at the back of his head, they had to change the headrest on his wheelchair so that he will not put any pressure on or touch the area on anything. The new headrest is about 2 ” x 4” which is now at the base of his scull and does not give him very good support. He complained today of neck pain, so he thought it would be better to stay in bed. I hope that tomorrow we can find a different head/neck rest so he can sit comfortably in his chair.

Last night, we went over to “our apartment” and I fixed chicken and dumplings for all of us. I had to rethink how to cook!!! I haven’t prepared anything since May 4th!! Actually, I could get used to that, but the meals have become quite repetitive here at the hospital!! Ryan really enjoyed the “home cooked” meal!!

Ryan continued with his dizziness; after dinner, we watch a movie and then he got quite restless and began hurting. We came back over to his room; while on the way, we met up with his Bishop, Bishop Hatch and his wife Nancy. By the time we got back to the room, Ryan just wanted to get back in bed so we proceeded to assist him. As we were helping to get him settled in bed, Meredith was unbuttoning his shirt, and the Bishop asked if she was used to undressing her dates, especially in front of a Bishop. She just chuckled. He asked if he needed to have an interview with her – then he said, “Probably not, I am standing right here!!” For those of you who have not met Meredith, she turns a lovely shade of red. (And it wasn’t from the sun).

We have some fun things planned this week. Ryan is scheduled to go on a fishing outing on Wednesday; they have a “sip and puff” fishing pole that he will use!! They tell us that the lake is joined by a beautiful park with lots of wildlife, so it should be pretty fun. He is also signed up to go to the Denver Zoo on Saturday. We hope that the weather will hold and it won’t be to hot or wet!

We had lots of visitors today; several of the kids from the Singles Ward came by to visit, as well as some Whitaker cousins! A couple of the kids that came by are very talented with music. One of the young men, Zach, brought his guitar and sang a song along with a friend, Susanna. Zach took a couple of Hymns (Lead Kindly Light and Abide with Me) and created a beautiful arrangement. It was quite lovely. We are so impressed with the youth of today, they are so kind, loving and supportive to Ryan and we don’t even know any of them!! The Gospel is a beautiful thing! We hope that we can take Ryan to their Sacrament Meeting in a couple of weeks.

We hope that all is well with each of you. Thanks again for all of your love and support.

Dean, Terry and Ryan

"Growing" Days

Oh, the ups and downs of Spinal Cord Injuries and the parents who don’t have a clue!!! Yesterday was not such a good day for Ryan. After our Family Conference, he had a downward spiral and it took him a day to recover!! It was quite an emotion day for him, he was also quiet dizzy all day and had a hard time even sitting up, he didn’t want to eat either (not good for his weight!).

He has a hard time sitting at a 90◦ degree angle anyway, so the Eye Doctor “tweaked” his glasses so he can see better when looking down towards his lap. Yesterday during his Occupational Therapy class, Dana showed him some different types of bookstands to use when reading or working on a project and a mouth stick to be used to turn pages or push buttons, etc. etc. He was not having it!! He told us later that he didn’t want to go home because he wasn’t going to be able to do anything like he had done before. We shed a few (or a lot) of tears and really didn’t have any answers for him other than, “It is going to be OK.” His night nurse (who is a doll!) came in and noticed that he wasn’t smiling as normal and she asked him how he was doing. He told her that he was having a bad day and she asked why. He told her that he “had thought about things too much all day.” She said, “Oh, you had a 'growing' day!” We never know who is going to say the right thing, but she hit the nail on the head!!! After we said prayers, we all went to bed and hoped that we could get some sleep!!!

Sleep helps, a bright new day and things look much better!! Ryan was smiling again this morning. He said, “I don’t know why yesterday was such a bad day, but things are going to be OK!!” His medical doctor caught him in the gym and asked how he was doing, he said that he had heard he had a bad day yesterday and wanted to check to see if everything was all right. Ryan told him that he was doing better, that it was more mental than anything else. I am so impressed that he is able to differentiate between the physical and mental aspect of this. I need to give him more credit! He told the doctor a little bit about the day and the doctor said, “It’s OK to have a 'crappy' day, let’s just chalk yesterday up to a 'crappy' day and move forward.” We all agreed!!

Audrey in Physical Therapy brought in some new T.E.D. hose for Ryan to try. Because of his erratic blood pressure, we are hoping that this will help the blood circulation. Because his legs are so thin, they wanted to try double layers for a few days to see if that would help. He had them on for a couple of hours and they seemed to work, TO GOOD. His blood pressure skyrocketed and his shoulders, neck and face were fire red and he complained of being hot. We took the nylons off and his normal color returned!!! Tomorrow we are going to try one layer and see how that works. We have decided that this is “trial and error.” Hopefully, we won’t have too many errors!!!

After the blood pressure episode, he had a lot of pain, the kind that feels like being buried in sand and a sunburn under his skin! Oh, what a feeling!! After he slept for about four hours, he felt much better. Tonight he is smiling and laughing. We love this part of the day!!!

Dean and I feel like we are “zeroing in” on some of the symptoms or warning signs and can kind of predict what is happening or what we need to do to try and fix the problem. We are slowly learning!!!

I am reading Elder Neal A. Maxwell’s book “If Thou Endure It Well,” he quotes David Brower as saying:

Until one is committed there is hesitancy, the chance to draw back, always ineffectiveness. Concerning all acts of initiative (and creation), there is one elementary truth, the ignorance of which kills countless ideas and splendid plans: that the moment one definitely commits oneself, then Providence moves too. All sorts of things occur to help one that would never otherwise have occurred. A whole stream of events issues from the decision, raising in one’s favor all manner of unforeseen, incidents and meetings and material assistance, which no man could have dreamt would have come his way.

It is tough to “commit” to this journey, but we know that our Heavenly Father will open doors that we never even thought possible. Our faith and hope for Ryan remains strong. We continue to receive letters, packages, phone calls, e-mails, cards and so on. We cannot tell each of you enough how much easier this journey is knowing that we have so much love and support.

Love, Dean, Terry and Ryan

Another Family Confrence

We had our Family Conference today. It was kinda like Family Home Evening when some of the family shows up but doesn’t have much good to say!! We learned that Ryan will get his halo removed July 27th, if all goes well. When we get closer to that date, they will do x-rays and an MRI or CAT scan to see if the vertebrae have fussed together properly. If not, they will look at other options such as, leaving the Halo on longer or surgery!!! Wait and see!

We also learned that his release date is August 26th!! WHEW! After digesting the time frame, we started asking questions as to taking Ryan home on a ventilator and how all of that was going to work??? We also discovered that our insurance will only cover 100 (4 hr.) visits per year; so I asked, “What about the other 265 days”? We were then told that we would be trained on all the workings of the ventilator. I think that Pat, from Family Services, could tell I was stressed because not long after the meeting, actually within minutes, Lonnie the head of Respiratory came in and reassured us that we would be fully trained before we left and we would know more than the caregivers or therapists that we find in Farmington (that’s even more scary!). I asked him if it was possible to do the “Ambu” bagging and dial 911 at the same time!!!???

We also had another “Adaptive Transportation” class today to fine-tune the “prescription” for the type of vehicle that will be required for Ryan. Because of his height and having a ventilator on the back of his chair, he will have to have a full size van with both a lowered floor and a raised roof. Ryan is having a hard time with the “van” idea so he decided to “ditch” the class today. Meredith gave him a hard time! We also learned in our Family Conference that our insurance won’t help with the costs of a van or a hydraulic lift for Ryan; it seems these items are not medically necessary!!! I don’t know how long it will take us for Ryan to “drive” his wheelchair to Farmington!!! I was hoping that some of this was going to be easy, but I guess we are going to have to get in the “trenches” and work the system. Hopefully, Medicaid and/or Vocational Rehab will help with some of the costs.

Ryan also had his eyes checked today. He wore glasses for several years prior to the accident, but hasn’t been able to wear them since; mostly due to the halo. We were a little concerned that the injury may have caused some change in his sight, but we learned that he has 20/25 near sighted vision and 20/30 farsighted vision. The Doctor tweaked his glasses a little bit so he could wear them with his Halo. The Doc didn’t think that not wearing his glasses had much to do with his dizziness, but asked us to watch and see if we noticed a difference.

We didn’t learn anymore about why his blood pressure nosedives and then skyrockets in the Conference today. The Doctor said that it is related to the neurological system not knowing what to do. So we will just continue to watch it! Ryan was put on three more antibiotics tonight, one for staff infection, one for what the nurse called a “gut” infection, one for some infection in his lungs and we can’t remember what the other one was for!! And, we are going to take him home!!!

We do continue to pray for miracles. We know that the Lord will guide us thru this next month and the decisions that we are facing.

With love to all,

Dean, Terry and Ryan

Answers

Today was pretty quiet after the weekend!! Ryan is still having problems with his blood pressure and dizziness. He “black-out” again this afternoon. He was sitting in his chair in his room when his eyes dilated and he got that “glassy look!” Dean called for the nurses and they came running. It seems that his blood pressure drops very low and then skyrockets and he gets real dizzy. Today he said it felt like the room was spinning! They do not ever get here in time to take the blood pressure before it skyrockets so it is hard to tell how low it goes. There was quite a bit of discussion as to what the problem could be and no one can seem to figure it out. They are going to check for inner ear problems to see if that may be causing the dizziness and spinning. They tell us they will continue to watch it and see what happens!!!

There is a BYU-Provo student here. Seth Loughmiller was in a car accident in Spanish Fork Canyon and has a T4-T5 injury; leaving him a paraplegic. He and his wife Kierstie (sp) were married in February of this year; she is going to BYU Law School this fall and Seth wants to finish his degree in Biology. Seth is hoping to be back at school this fall. We have enjoyed getting to know them. Last night Seth was telling us that he had a class this morning at 8:00 a.m. We were talking about the difficulties of getting up and being somewhere at eight in the morning here at Craig when Seth commented, “I didn’t get to my class at 8:00 when I had legs!” We all had a good laugh!! It seems that the most of the patients here are blessed with such positive attitudes and great sense of humors.

We continue to see new patients come in every week. I saw the air ambulance nursing staff and the EMT who drove the ambulance when Ryan came in bring in another patient the other day. We made eye contact and said hello across the hall, but I wanted to tell him that he was not to come here anymore!!! It makes me sad, because we know that another family is devastated by the circumstances that bring them here. We were talking to a “new” family tonight that have lots of questions that no one can answer!! We tried to smile and tell them that it was going to be OK, but we didn’t have any answers either!! Pretty tough. One mother asked her son’s doctor if they could put 20 million songs on an I-Pod, why don’t they have more cures for spinal cord injuries. He told her that there are millions and millions of people willing to contribute for entertainment research, but with only approximately 15,000 spinal cord injuries a year, not enough contribute to medical research.

On the brighter side of things, we were able to go to the sixth-floor of the Swedish Hospital parking garage and watch the fireworks last night. We could see for miles in every direction. It was pretty awesome to see; some were quiet close and others seemed to be quiet far away, nonetheless, quite a sight. It didn’t compare to Farmington’s or the fireworks we saw in Silverton last year, only because we weren’t able to hear the patriotic songs which usually accompany the show. But, we were reminded of the great freedoms we do enjoy here in America. We are so grateful to those individuals who have served and/or died for the liberties we enjoy and most times take for granted.

We have our second Family Conference tomorrow. Having gone thru the first one, hopefully we won’t be so traumatized!! We hopefully will discuss the blood pressure issues and maybe get some answers!!

Thanks for your continue support and encouragement. We are SO BLESSED.

Dean, Terry and Ryan

A Great 4th of July Weekend

What a great weekend!!! We had lots of company and lots of fun!! We wore Ryan out -- but he said he had a great time. Friday we had our big outing; we went and saw Cinderella Man. By the way, it is a great movie -- nothing like the title! There were three patients all together; Scott, Tom and Ryan. All three have C1 or C2 injuries and are on ventilators. Scott, Tom and Ryan went on a bus, similar to an airline shuttle bus, it holds three to five wheelchairs and then up to 14 people. We weren't able to ride on the bus as there were too many staff members. It takes several more "hands" to care for patients on ventilators. Scott's son Kevin, his sister, her husband and their two year old boy, Jack, accompanied Scott. Dean and I, Geralyn and Keith, as well as Pam and Mom accompanied Ryan. I guess Tom has been here long enough that the staff has become his family! As we were loading Ryan onto the bus via the wheelchair lift he had a smile on his face and Jack looked up at Ryan and said, "Look mama, he is happy!!" Ryan has such a sweet spirit about him; even two year olds pick up on it! We first went to a park and had a picnic; the weather was great and Colorado has some beautiful blue skies. As we were sitting visiting and eating, Dean and Keith noticed that there was a girl’s fast pitch team warming up to play in the softball field nearby. Keith pointed out that the two pitchers were warming up with their coaches (which happened to be "older" men!!) as they sat on five gallon plastic buckets as catchers!! Keith commented, "Boy, now they have got the right idea!!"

Friday night we had a nice surprise! Dean went to the airport to pick up Meredith. On the way, Michelle told him that Lisa and Carli (Pam's daughter) would be coming in about a half hour after Meredith's flight! We had talked to Lisa earlier in the week and told her we didn't think it would be possible for her to come because we had just taken her to Rexburg the previous weekend. As you can imagine, she was feeling "left out" as all her siblings were going to be here and she was going to be all alone in Rexburg!! We decided that she could drive to Provo and visit Dean's family, if she could find someone to travel with her. She made arrangements to drive to Provo with Carli. When they came walking into Ryan's room, I thought they had driven from Rexburg to Denver! My mouth dropped to the floor as all the images of two "little" girls on the highways of Utah, Wyoming, and Colorado -- in an older car!! I was so glad to see her; but was quite relieved when I learned that an "airline-fairy" had arranged their flight to Denver!!!

As we have noted before, weekends are pretty low key here at Craig. Because of the Fourth of July celebration, a lot of family and friends came to see their loved ones. The halls were buzzing with excitement, as well as tears. Families and friends shared their love, support and concerns for the patients, their caregivers and families as we all try and sift through the challenges and decisions that have to be made. The Craig facility encourages families and friends to get involved and is quiet accommodating. We were able to reserve the "Digby Friendship Center," which is a large open kitchen/dining/family room area with a gas barbeque grill just outside of the room. We were able to gather and have a nice barbeque dinner while playing games, visiting, reminiscing and trying to figure out what to do next! Ryan enjoyed all the company, but again, it was another first. He doesn't like to be the center of attention, yet wants to be involved in all the activities -- what a challenge!!! We wore him out; he came back to the room and slept for three hours!! We were able to reserve the room again Sunday afternoon to watch a movie. We also ate (for some reason we can always figure out a way to have food!), played cards, and enjoyed each others company.

The days can't go without some "medical" interruption!! We learned that Ryan's potassium is low again. Ryan said, "I have eaten a banana everyday, I guess that is not enough!!" So, more pills! We also learned that he has an infection somewhere!! The laboratory work is being done now, but they started him on an antibiotic thru an IV which will take about seven to ten days! We keep hoping that things will "balance out" at some point.

After we visited Sunday night, it was time to say "goodbyes" as everyone will be traveling home Monday. Lots of tears, but we are so grateful for such a loving and supportive family.

After everyone left, Dean, Meredith and I talked and have concluded that this month may be the hardest month! We keep hearing "when you go home" and so we are going to have to make some tough hard decisions about home remodeling/selling/rebuilding, transportation, schooling, around-the-clock care, jobs, a communication system so we don't have to sleep with Ryan!, etc. etc. We all hope we are up to the task, some hours this is bigger than we are. We do recognize the Lord's hand in all things and know that He will "carry us thru" this ordeal. We thank you all and love you for your kindness and goodness.

Dean, Terry and Ryan